Chapter 12

Surely Mel must have a family too. It was because of me that he couldn’t see them.

I knew how painful it was not to be able to see one’s family, to not be able to see one’s mother.

Yet I was doing the exact same thing to Mel that my father had done to me.

“This is how you write the word for ‘mother’.”

With trembling hands, I wrote the word in large letters on the paper.

Whether it was due to my body starting to go numb, or because of a guilty conscience, it took a long time just to write that simple word.

My hands shook as I taped the paper to the tank so Mel could see it.

Mel stared intently not at the paper, but at my hands.

“Mel…… you know.”

To distract him from his gaze, I tried to say whatever came to mind.

Even mundane small talk, like saying the weather was nice today, would have been fine.

However, my thoughts—paralyzed by chronic and erratic pain—blurted out something entirely different instead.

“Do you miss your family?”

“Do you miss your family?”

Of course he missed them. What kind of question was that?

Blaming my own stupidity, I tried to write off the question as if I had never said it.

Just then, Mel pointed to a certain word on the tank’s wall.

Tap, tap.

“You want to go…… to the ocean?”

I asked back, forcing myself to maintain a smile.

At my words, Mel wore an ambiguous expression, then slowly shook his head and pointed to ‘ocean’ once again.

He wanted to go to the ocean, but that wasn’t what he was trying to say.

Tap, tap.

“Your family is in the ocean?”

Mel shook his head again.

Though it made no sense by human standards…… I thought perhaps things were different in the world of merfolk, so I spoke up.

“……Are you saying the ocean is your family?”

Only then did Mel nod with a bright expression.

Seeing his face smile so radiantly, as if merely thinking of the ocean brought him happiness, made me feel a bit dazed.

“Haa, haa!”

That night, I woke up gasping in pain.

Fortunately, the curtains were drawn, so Mel wouldn’t be able to see me squirming in agony.

My heart beat rapidly before slowing down drastically, making me feel dizzy.

‘Is it because I dreamt of the ocean? Am I suddenly feeling guilty now, of all times?’

A self-mocking laugh escaped me.

I curled up like a young animal, breathing heavily.

Thump—!

Just then, I heard a dull sound of something knocking against the wall.

Did a servant drop something in the hallway?

Just as I thought that, a short groan was heard.

“Ugh!”

That clear, beautiful voice belonged to Mel.

A bad premonition made me forget the pain entirely. I hurried out of bed and pulled back the curtain.

Swish!

“……Mel?”

Cold sweat broke out on my forehead just from moving the short distance across the room.

I stared blankly at the scene inside the tank.

Thump!

Every time Mel unconsciously tossed and turned in his sleep, his tail struck the glass of the tank.

It was unavoidable. No matter how large the tank was by human standards, it was far too cramped a space for a boy of my age to live in.

“Ugh…….”

Even in his sleep, Mel seemed to feel the pain, as he instinctively wrapped his arms around his tail.

In doing so, however, he bumped into the glass once again.

Tap!

A silver-blue scale detached from Mel’s tail and slid down toward the bottom of the tank.

Suddenly, I noticed that many scales had accumulated in a corner at the bottom of the tank.

“You were hiding them under the sand.”

Underneath the slightly disturbed sand, a cluster of scales was gathered.

It was a corner usually hidden from my view by Mel’s body.

“…….”

It was then that I realized. I couldn’t let Mel stay in this tank any longer.

If I couldn’t send him to the ocean, I had to at least send him back to the lake.

“How is the forest doing right now?”

A few days later, after much deliberation, I asked the maid who was setting up my meal on the bed.

Due to my frail body, I was accustomed to eating on my bed.

“So many trees were burned down that…… they planted saplings, but the botanist said it will probably take nearly a hundred years for it to regain its former state.”

A hundred years. If it were a few decades, I might have felt regret, but hearing a hundred years made me let go of any lingering attachment.

No healthy human alive today could survive a hundred years from now anyway.

I quite liked that forest. I had only visited a few times, but I loved the lake that was in it.

I felt quite sad knowing I could no longer see the scenery as it used to be.

“……I see. What about the lake? Is the lake affected as well?”

“The lake appeared to be fine now.”

What a relief. As long as the lake was fine, nothing else mattered.

I nodded and continued eating.

It was lunch, but it consisted only of soup, a salad, and a small piece of meat for minimal protein intake.

Personally, I preferred seafood over beef, but ever since Mel and I began sharing the room again, I stopped eating seafood.

“I’m done eating.”

“Wouldn’t you like to eat a bit more……?”

“My stomach feels uneasy, so I don’t think I can.”

“Yes, I understand.”

The maid cleared the meal, and I sat on the bed reading a book.

Tap, tap.

Just then, I heard Mel tapping against the wall of the tank from behind the curtain.

I thought he was taking a nap, but he must have been awake.

Ever since losing his voice, Mel would gently tap on the tank whenever he needed to call me.

Coincidentally, I had something to tell him as well.

With a bitter smile, I stepped down from the bed and walked over to the tank.

Swish!

When I pulled back the curtain, I saw Mel looking at me with trembling eyes.

Other than the bruises on his tail and the fallen scales, Mel no longer had any external wounds.

However, he still couldn’t produce a sound.

“Mel? What’s wrong?”

“…….”

Mel seemed to want to convey something that was difficult to express through simple gestures or mouthing words.

Mel quickly began writing a sentence on the sand spread across the bottom of the tank.

In truth, Mel learned everything instantly once he was taught.

Yet strangely, writing sentences seemed difficult for him; up until yesterday, he had still communicated by pointing at individual words.

I felt a bit surprised by his sudden improvement, but I quietly read the sentence Mel had written.

「Why did you ask about the lake?」

It was a matter I would have had to bring up even if you hadn’t pressed me for it.

To keep myself from getting hurt as much as possible, I put on a fake smile, pretending I had no lingering attachments.

“……That? I asked because I’m going to send you back to the lake.”

I still vividly remembered the day I first sent Mel to the lake.

Though he suffered before getting used to fresh water, Mel had chosen to stay in the lake.

That was how terribly he hated the tank and being by my side.

“The tank is far too cramped and uncomfortable. Besides, you hate the tank anyway, so isn’t this a good thing?”

“…….”

“It would be nice if I could go visit you, but even if I can’t, I’ll write letters.”

Unexpectedly, Mel merely stared at me with a blank expression.

I couldn’t understand its meaning. He didn’t look happy.

Rather, it looked closer to emotions like disappointment, resentment, betrayal…….

Ah. You’re acting like this because I’m not sending you to the ocean.

After talking so much as if I truly worried about you—spouting nonsense about giving you the Duchy’s emblem when sending you to the ocean, or teaching you to write because I was worried about you being caught by other humans—the end result was just sending you back to the lake, which is why you’re reacting like this.

“Why? Are you disappointed because it isn’t the ocean?”

“Why? Are you disappointed because it isn’t the ocean?”

Perhaps sensing the chill in my voice, Mel flinched and hurriedly shook his head.

He clearly thought that if he answered ‘yes,’ I would feel offended and keep him locked in the tank forever.

I looked at the traces of the time we had spent together, taped to the tank.

They were papers filled with various words and grammar lessons, written down one by one.

I had thought that Mel and I had grown truly close during this time. Once again, I realized it was just a delusion on my part.

「I’m really not disappointed. Please don’t misunderstand.」

I watched Mel frantically write out the sentence.

However, when he wrote the next sentence, his speed slowed down significantly.

「Thank you…… for thinking of me…… and sending me to the lake.」

“No need to be thankful.”

I deliberately let out a sneer.

I looked at Mel’s fully healed physical appearance and his writing skills, which had advanced enough to no longer need me.

Now, my usefulness to him had come to an end.

When that moment arrived, I could no longer maintain my smile.

I spat out words I didn’t truly mean.

“Now that your wounds are healed and you know how to write, what a relief.”

“…….”

“I’ll send you to the lake today. I’ll go call the servants, so wait here.”

At my words, Mel began writing something on the sand again. But I turned around, not wanting to see what he had to write.

Tap, tap!

Mel tapped on the tank to stop me.

Even though I knew, I didn’t look back.

At that, Mel pounded heavily on the glass. He had never done that before.

Bang, bang!

“…….”

Is it that urgent?

Well, it makes sense.

He said the ocean was his family. Since the ocean is your family, you must be terrified of being separated from them forever.

But as long as I am alive, you cannot go to the ocean.

I am not ready to let you go yet.

Holding the door handle, I spoke without turning around.

“Dapin, whom you liked so much, said it before, didn’t she? That once I die, she would send you back to the ocean.”

“…….”

“It’s true to some extent. Until I die, you cannot go back. So stop pounding on the tank.”